Jesus taught us how to forgive out of love, how to forget out of humility. So let us examine our hearts and see if there is any unforgiven hurt – any unforgotten bitterness! It is easy to love those who are far away. It isn’t always easy to love those who are right next to us. It is easier to offer food to the hungry than to answer the lonely suffering of someone who lacks love right in one’s own family. The world today is upside down because there is so very little love in the home, and in family life.
~Mother Teresa
Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to be made. So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.’ And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt. But when that same servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii, and seizing him, he began to choke him, saying, ‘Pay what you owe.’ So his fellow servant fell down and pleaded with him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you.’ He refused and went and put him in prison until he should pay the debt. When his fellow servants saw what had taken place, they were greatly distressed, and they went and reported to their master all that had taken place. Then his master summoned him and said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you?’ And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt. So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.
~ Jesus, King of The Universe, and Forgiver of my ten thousand talent’s worth of sin, in Matthew 18
Oh beloved, it is true.
People will hurt us. They will do things that are unjust. And, when they do, it is not OK. But:
When we forgive evil we do not excuse it, we do not tolerate it,
we do not smother it. We look the evil full in the face,
call it what it is, let its horror shock and stun and enrage us,
and only then do we forgive it.
~ Lewis B. Smedes
A friend in Africa, tonight reminded this fool of a writer that it is a gift to be hurt, and a greater gift to know how to forgive. I have nearly learned this part of life, and so maybe I can share some things with you readers on forgiveness.
First: Here is what forgiveness IS:
- Cancelling a debt owed to you.
- Removing the control the offender has over you.
- Giving a gift to yourself and to your offender.
- Forsaking revenge.
- Leaving ultimate justice in God’s hands.
- Ongoing process.
- Wanting good for your offender.
Secondly: Here is what forgiveness IS NOT:
- Denying sin has occurred nor diminishing its evil.
- Enabling sin.
- A response to an apology.
- Covering up crimes committed against us.
- Forgetting.
- Trust.
- Reconciliation.
Can we see it?
Forgiveness is actually powerful beyond the blast of a thermonuclear weapon. Forgiveness is an eternally present thing. Forgiveness is a gift bigger than the largest punishment you or I could mete out on anyone.
So, are you having trouble forgiving? Welcome to the process. However, if we choose this path, we will find that we are given a gift more precious than we know. We can look our offender in the eye, and tell them their fault. But then, we can let that person work out the issue with the One who is keeping the books anyway.
Tonight is your night to forgive someone.
“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.’ … ‘Forgiving does not erase the bitter past.’ … ‘You will know that forgiveness has begun when you recall those who hurt you and feel the power to wish them well.”
~Lewis B. Smedes
