When I saw my name on Nancy’s reply and realized I hadn’t received it, I found it in my Junk file. There is a message from God here – you have to continually search your junk file to find the gems there. Nancy is correct, Mak. Katie’s story could be yours. I have seen you let Jesus into your heart and explode. Moving back here will not be easy, but God doesn’t believe in easy… it’s not the place where you are at; it’s where you heart is at in the place. Love you, my friend.
~ an Angel who wrote a message to his friend, on a very hard day
Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her Husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be His people, and God Himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”
~ The Blessed Hope of every believer, in Revelation 21
Oh beloved, it is true.
There is a truth in the life of a person who has given their lives to Christ. Like the Apostle Paul said in Romans 12, the only reasonable response for someone who has come to understand what Jesus has done for them is to present their lives as a living sacrifice for Him to use as He pleases.
But, we have no idea what that means as we climb onto our own self-imagined altars; thinking that He will burn us up in some epic consummation, or pour us out in some final moment. Not so much… At least not until we are ready, and our burning up will do the most good. The martyrs before us and around us do give witness to this for sure!
Plus, there is so much junk in our lives, we wonder if He would even accept us in the first place.
However, back to the martyr thing… most of us are not ready for this. And the martyr in His economy is much more like a firework that lights the way in incredibly dark moments of history, to point us to Christ. Those dear friends who have gone before us, are Home and wildly free.
But G_d, being the Amazing Father He Is, usually chooses to do something else with many of His children. Dance… He chooses to dance with us. Oh, actually, it is Him doing the dancing, but over the years we begin to catch the rhythm. And, for so long, this is so hard for us. We have always imagined that things are always going to be difficult, and He is going to need to be so stern with us.
But…
Can we see it?
As He teaches us the steps of His Way, He also rumbles through the junk in the back closets of our souls, and as He wipes the mud off of our sin-soaked eyes and ears, we begin to see something coming true. Oh, it was actually true a long time ago, but we couldn’t yet believe it. Down in the darkest corners of who we are, He reaches in and brings forth Gold and Precious Jewels and things much more precious than this.
Love. He has, in His teaching us to dance, taught us what is the most precious. Love. Love is what holds Them together. Love is what binds us to Him. Love is what makes us yearn for the good of others. And somehow, in all the years of us falteringly learning to dance (and thinking that we needed to keep sacrificing) we find that He has already done all the sacrificing necessary and just desires that we let go of our pre-conceived notions of what we think He wants us to do – and to simply dance with Him – in His arms.
Now, the dance does indeed have a number of complex steps. And, it is at times the most strenuous of routines. But mostly, and most importantly, are the extended moments where we let Him fully take the lead and we just lean our heads down on His chest, into the lush folds of his clothing. The scent alone is enough to refresh us forever, but then, OH! We hear it. We hear His very Own Heart beating out it rhythm of unending Love for us.
Once this happens, we are never the same. Our hearts cannot contain it. We are remade and undone at the same time. We are nearly (though not yet completely) as wildly free as those who danced instantly into His near presence through death and martyrdom. But, we are so much more incredibly free than we have ever been – and our lives begin to look more and more like the One we will see one day when we too go Home.
So, have you been going through a bunch of junk and tough times in your life? Are you feeling that this is all there is to experience, and that maybe this is all there is to you? This is a lie. And lies are dangerous when we believe them. The truth is: you (and this fool of writer) are precious beyond belief. All the junk in our lives has been made beautiful in Him.
Tonight is your night. Search through the junk. You will find the treasure!
Larry Hein, who wrote the blessing: “May all your expectations be frustrated, may all your plans be thwarted, may all your desires be withered into nothingness, that you may experience the powerlessness and poverty of a child and sing and dance in the love of God who is Father, Son, and Spirit.”
~ Brennan Manning, Abba’s Child: The Cry of the Heart for Intimate Belonging
