Battle-Softened Warrior

…I thank Thee that Thou art risen from the dead, that at this very moment Thou dost indwell me in the person and power of Thy divine Spirit; that Thou hast never expected of me anything but failure, yet Thou hast given to me Thy strength for my weakness, Thy victory for my defeat, Thyself for all my bankruptcy! I step out now, by faith, into a future that is limited only by what Thou art! To me to live is Christ!
~Ian Thomas

May grace and peace be multiplied to you. Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to His great mercy, He has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God’s power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. Though you have not seen Him, you love Him. Though you do not now see Him, you believe in Him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls… Therefore, preparing your minds for action, and being sober-minded, set your hope fully on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. As obedient children, do not be conformed to the passions of your former ignorance, but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, since it is written, “You shall be holy, for I am holy.” And if you call on Him as Father who judges impartially according to each one’s deeds, conduct yourselves with fear throughout the time of your exile, knowing that you were ransomed from the futile ways inherited from your forefathers, not with perishable things such as silver or gold, but with the precious blood of Christ, like that of a lamb without blemish or spot. He was foreknown before the foundation of the world but was made manifest in the last times for the sake of you who through Him are believers in God, Who raised Him from the dead and gave Him glory, so that your faith and hope are in God.
~ from 1 Peter 1

Oh beloved, it is true.

Throughout our sojourn here, we have come to learn something. And all of this has been necessary. Necessary in that we would finally come to abandon hope in ourselves.

Battle upon battle has been ours to lose. And lose them we did. But, in each loss, there is something that we have gained. Each time that we lost confidence in ourselves; each time we walked away disgusted at our own failures, we became more enamored with One Who is always victorious.

After all, He even won us. We were totally dead in our sins, and He made us alive in Himself.

Can we see it?

The testing of our faith is not to make us stronger. The testing of our faith is to slay us. The testing of our faith is to show us that the only thing we have, is faith in His faithful ability to raise us up out of the miry clay of our flesh, and for us to “set (y)our hope fully on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”

However, in coming through to this kind of humiliating realization. We come through to what we have always been looking for anyway. In all of our foolishness, and lusting after power and position and pleasure and honor, we finally find what we were truly looking for.

Love.

And once this Love takes hold, we no longer really want anything else. Oh yes, we fail. We get weak and tired, but all of this even firms up our way of thinking – even more as it softens our resolve in ourselves. We become utterly convinced of His Power, His Goodness, His Love, and His Readiness to take us fully apart unto Himself.

In all of this, nothing else matters anymore… We are now set in our Hope. We are His. We have been bought out of our bondage to our own false sense of importance and strength. We are now soft and supple in His hands. We are the malleable gold of His Kingdom. We have – in Him – become the very righteousness of G_d, in Christ.

So, are you struggling with the things that you used to think you were so strong about, and so able to handle? It happens. It happens to each of us. However, this may be your night to understand that each test and failure is not designed to bring you shame, they are designed to soften your heart towards His strength.

Tonight is your night. Let Him soften your resolve in yourself, that your faith in Him will become joy-filled and diamond-strong!

Nothing is more opposed to God than pride, for self-deification is concealed in it, its own nothingness or sin. Thus more than anything humility is acceptable to God, which considers itself nothing, and attributes all goodness, honor, and glory to God alone. Pride does not accept grace, because it is full of itself, while humility easily accepts grace, because it is free from itself, and from all that is created. God creates out of nothing. As long as we think that we can offer something of ourselves, He does not begin His work in us. Humility is the salt of virtue. As salt gives flavor to food, so humility gives perfection to virtue. Without salt, food goes bad easily, and without humility, virtue is easily spoiled by pride, vainglory, impatience – and it perishes. There is a humility which a man gains by his own struggles: knowing his own insufficiency, accusing himself for his failings, not allowing himself to judge others. And there is a humility into which God leads a man through the things that happen to him: allowing him to experience afflictions, humiliations, and deprivations.
~St. Philaret of Moscow