Love is swift, pure, tender, joyful, and pleasant. Love is strong, patient, faithful, prudent, long-suffering, vigorous, and never self-seeking. For when a man is self-seeking, he abandons love. Love is watchful, humble, and upright. Love is not fickle and sentimental, nor is it intent on vanities. It is sober, pure, steadfast, quiet, and guarded in all the senses. Love is submissive and obedient to superiors, mean and contemptible in its own sight, devoted and thankful to God, trusting and hoping in him even when not enjoying his sweetness; for none can live in love without suffering.
~Thomas à Kempis (c. 1380-1471)
Now when Mary came to where Jesus was and saw Him, she fell at His feet, saying to Him, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come with her also weeping, He was deeply moved in His spirit and greatly troubled. And He said, “Where have you laid him?” They said to Him, “Lord, come and see.”
Jesus wept. So the Jews said, “See how He loved him!” But some of them said, “Could not He who opened the eyes of the blind man also have kept this man from dying?” Then Jesus, deeply moved again, came to the tomb…. Jesus said to her, “Did I not tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God?” … When He had said these things, He cried out with a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out.” The man who had died came out, his hands and feet bound with linen strips, and his face wrapped with a cloth. Jesus said to them, “Unbind him, and let him go.”
~ from John 11
Oh beloved, it is true. There are things hard even for the infinite. Surely, nothing is too hard for Him. All is possible. But to say that the Life of G_d is an effortless existence is to miss the point altogether. G_d does work, and even sweat blood on our behalf.
There are days in the life of a reflective believer that are better than most. And most of the days of a fool drenched in His Presence and Word are pretty good to begin with. But sometimes, the torrent of His Love – once again – crushes the defenses we put up against it. The Love is just too big. Any attempt at understanding scale is foolish pride and idolatry as in this we but try to contain Him into some god of our own making.
Enormous
Limitless
Torrential
Real
Heart-rending
Earth-shattering
Love.
This fool of a writer has always wondered why, at the root of it all, why Jesus wept at the tomb of His beloved friend, Lazarus. Surely, Jesus knew that Lazarus was in a better place than this fallen world, so He was not sad for his destiny. Surely, Jesus felt sorrow for the mourning of the two sisters, but this does not seem to be a compelling reason to bring a man back from beyond.
And then i saw it. Jesus was nearly overwhelmed by all of it. Yes, the loss of a friend, and yes, the mourning of his dear friends. But it was bigger than this. Jesus was greatly troubled not by just the situation that could be seen with human eyes. Additionally, Jesus was troubled by the last and greatest enemy of all life.
Jesus was troubled (deeply) by the problem of death.
And His troubled spirit was not trembling at the unknown in some sort of childish ignorance. No, Jesus knew death. And Jesus knew that death is something so much more incredibly horrible than we can ever begin to imagine. Jesus knew that death is exceedingly more than just ceasing to live, but that it is the complete separation of a being from the prospect of Life and Love and Hope. He knew that death was the nearly-infinite waste of a nearly-infinitely valuable person.
But it was much deeper for Jesus in that moment.
There arose within our Captain of The Hosts, a righteous anger and a lashing out in His Spirit against the great enemy of those whom His Soul Loves. Jesus hated death greatly, and the emotion was something He chose not to contain any more in that moment.
This anger was not energy that was foolishly spent. It was merely a quick wisp of steam from the boiler of His rage against this enemy. The energy would be fully spent as Jesus would soon charge into death’s headquarters and read death’s own sentence of doom, while demanding (and receiving) the keys to the entire place of death’s authority.
But then, it got even worse for Jesus.
Jesus knew that this moment (the scene with His friends) was a shadow of things to come. In a short time, Jesus would be facing His own death on behalf of everyone. And the prospect of ceasing to breathe after a brutal and tortuous period of berating, beating and crucifying was bad enough. But the deepest part of the truth was that the Trinity was about to be tested.
There was to be a moment of separation (actual time) wherein the Ones who had been One forever, would not be. And for Jesus to not have the Light of His Father’s countenance shining on Him was devastating. Forever One, and now that was going to end for a moment and Jesus had only trust left as He cast His Spirit into His Father’s hands. “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?” This loss is unfathomable in that The Infinite tore itself asunder in Love for us.
But there is more. He wept for Joy.
For Jesus knew that the plan was going to work. It was already done, for His slaying had been accomplished before the foundations of the world in the Counsel of the ages. And the effect of the victory in His humiliation has yet to be fully realized as the seeds coming forth in the fruit of His death hold potential beyond any measure we can put up.
