I repent me of the ignorance wherein I ever said that God made man out of nothing: there is no nothing out of which to make anything; God is all in all, and he made us out of himself.
~George MacDonald, Wind from the Stars
For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.
Look: I, Paul, say to you that if you accept circumcision, Christ will be of no advantage to you. I testify again to every man who accepts circumcision that he is obligated to keep the whole law. You are severed from Christ, you who would be justified by the law; you have fallen away from grace. For through the Spirit, by faith, we ourselves eagerly wait for the hope of righteousness. For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision counts for anything, but only faith working through love. You were running well. Who hindered you from obeying the truth? This persuasion is not from Him who calls you. A little leaven leavens the whole lump. I have confidence in the Lord that you will take no other view, and the one who is troubling you will bear the penalty, whoever he is. But if I, brothers, still preach circumcision, why am I still being persecuted? In that case the offense of the cross has been removed. I wish those who unsettle you would emasculate themselves! For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” But if you bite and devour one another, watch out that you are not consumed by one another. But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.
~ paul, The Least of The Apostles, in Galatians 5
Oh beloved, it is true.
This fool of a writer does not often resolve to do much. However, when Scripture gives a command, i will follow it. So here goes…
Resolved for life:
1. To live in The Love with which He has Loved me.
2. To Love others with this same Love.
3. To abandon all other pursuits other than those that are driven by Love (read: Him).
And surely, many of you readers would look at something like this and laugh or snicker or even begin to giggle at the foolishness of this resolution. “Impossible,” you would say, “it cannot be done.” And in many ways you might be right.
But, right you aren’t.
We forget, that though we may live in isolation from the Love of G_d, there is no way that we can ultimately avoid it. Though people who scorn the Love of G_d are fond of saying that those who will not submit to His Love will be “thrown into hell,” they too are wrong.
People will not be thrown into hell. They will go into it themselves. They will simply follow-through on their desire to live life alone and in the power of their own feeble flesh. They will be given, by a Loving Creator, the option to walk away from simply resting in faith. And astoundingly, the vast majority of people who have ever lived, will choose this path.
Their path will indeed be hellish, and the end result will be hell itself. For any place apart from His Love cannot be – in any way – fulfilling. And an empty human is the worst sort of creature, for we only operate properly when full of the Only Thing that will fill us up.
However, the opposite situation is just as true. If we will but stop. If we will but change our minds from centered on self, to centered on The Truth (read: Him). If we will but simply allow for the reality to overtake us, He will. He will burst through our tiny, little walls of isolation we have been attempting to build. Oh, it was never that our walls could actually keep Him out, but Love respects boundaries. Love does not force Itself on another and It does not demand Its own way.
But, when we allow the walls to be torn down, it is not that they let G_d in, it is more like we finally take down the obstacles to our vision and experience of what is really happening all around us – and simply join it. It is, if you will, a bit like driving now with the windshield sunscreen removed. We now have a clear view of the road that has always been there.
So much of this writer’s past behaviors make me “feel” like this simply can’t be possible. I have hurt so many people. I have made so many mistakes. I have pushed G_d so far to the side, that it seems like I could have even hurt His feelings enough that even He might simply walk away.
So much of this writer’s past experiences have hurt me so deeply that there were extended periods of time where I wondered if I would ever just be able to function within the world. The betrayals I experienced in career and family and intimate relationships had brought me to a place of such disorientation that a chemical haze seemed the only place where anything made any sense.
There was this day though, where I had finally had enough. I just gave up, and plopped down and laid there. Death was near, real death with blood pouring out within me from internal bleeding brought on by stress, failure and drinking. Pretty much everyone had given up on me.
Not Him. He found me lovely. He was so excited and joyful!
A few weeks later I heard His Voice, it had been some time. A decade of my putting up the blinders had made it pretty hard to see Him and also made it hard to hear. Thankfully, those came tumbling down in the weeks after the end of the the decades-long crash of my life.
I heard Him clearly. He had promised me at the beginning of my debacle (brought on by a slaughtering betrayal of trust) that we would be able to sit down one Day and He would answer all of my questions… And that we could take absolutely as long as I wanted.
I heard Him clearly again. He said, “I AM so glad that we are going to be able to keep this appointment!” It is difficult to explain what this is like, that the first Person to express His trust in you, when you have broken everyone else’s trust, is the G_d of the universe. But this I know, I felt more Loved than I had felt in years.
The intervening years have only brought this reality to a greater light for me. G_d does not just Love me. He is simply Himself with me. And I now, can simply be myself with Him – for we are wed. We are one. We have been united in His Life and His Death and His Resurrection. We could no more be separated than the Trinity could lose track of Each Other. His very Spirit has bound me to Themselves.
Over the years, the doubts have nagged a bit, but this is why I make the resolutions above. I now realize that there is no other Life than that which is in Him (read: in Love). It’s been a good road getting to this place, and all the pain has been worth it. It only helps me be able to stop and Love the person who needs it in ways that I have been hurt.
Could I say this to you too beloved? I love you. But, it is not because I made some resolution upon which I will soon grow tired. No, it is simply because I have come to know exactly who I am. I am the friend of Love Himself. And He finds you lovely too.
May you find this Love. Tonight is your night. Time to let Him be Who He is for you.
