In time of trouble go not out of yourself to seek for aid; for the whole benefit of trial consists in silence, patience, rest, and resignation. In this condition divine strength is found for the hard warfare because God himself fights for the soul.
~Miguel de Molinos (1628-1696)
Since therefore it remains for some to enter it, and those who formerly received the good news failed to enter because of disobedience, again He appoints a certain day, “Today,” saying through David so long afterward, in the words already quoted, “Today, if you hear His voice, do not harden your hearts.” For if Joshua had given them rest, God would not have spoken of another day later on. So then, there remains a Sabbath rest for the people of God, for whoever has entered God’s rest has also rested from his works as God did from His. Let us therefore strive to enter that rest, so that no one may fall by the same sort of disobedience. For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. And no creature is hidden from His sight, but all are naked and exposed to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account. Since then we have a great High Priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.
~ from Hebrews 4
Oh beloved, it is true. There are extended and grim moments in the life of a warrior. They are moments full of battle for freedom. And a true warrior does not fight for himself, but spends himself for others and at Another’s behest. For to fight only for one’s own freedom is but rebellion in the end.
And the people for whose freedom we fight, are often unable to appreciate that they are even in danger. They have been living their lives in the darkness of their pain for so long, that the bitter dimness of their existence seems to be normal, even tenable. So, as we move to help extricate the people we have been called to help, they may even lash out at us as though we are some sort of enemy.
Wounded people often fight back at necessary help. But very often, the hoped for outcome comes true. And the person for whom we are fighting, finally breaks free from their bonds and begins to run free from the thing that was keeping them down. It is moments like this that warriors live (and often die) for. Rescue.
However, the path to the other person’s freedom often costs the rescuer exceedingly more that the person being rescued. While it is the rescuer’s privilege to spend himself for the weaker vessel, the energy spent is real – and the pain inflicted by the rescuee on the rescuer is often significant.
It is here where a warrior can enter into a significant problem. The angst of battle, especially a protracted one, can leave deep wounds in the fighter for freedom. And that same warrior can then be left edgy, hurt and even a bit angry at the rescuee as they go skipping off into life – sometimes without so much as a thank you, or even confession of the fact that they have even been helped a little bit.
Often even further, a person who has been set free will blame the person who has set them free for their former bondage. It is axiomatic that no good deed goes unpunished (at least in the short term). And in response to the negative response of the rescuee, there is the temptation for the warrior to go instantly back to battle stations when any of the stress involved in the former mission manifests itself through these other cues. The modern term is useful: Post-traumatic Stress Syndrome.
He says, “It is done son. At ease. Stand down. Well done. Thank you.”
But we can barely hear Him. We are even a bit perturbed that we were even sent on the mission in the first place. It seemed WAY over our training and pay-grade when we entered into the fray. We say something like, “That was really hard Father. There was almost nothing left of me after that one.”
And He simply laughs. It is a laughter drenched in Love and Joy and Peace. There is no fear or defensiveness in the laugh either. For The LORD Tsebaoth is both the Captain and strength of the very hosts of Heaven. He is utterly undaunted by the past or the future, because He is there even now and fully in control.
Then He says, “The fight never was yours anyway beloved, and the outcome was never in doubt. You can do all things in me. Come rest in my presence. Stay. Oh, and by the way, you needed a bit more rescuing from your own self too, so I got two for the price of one rescue on this one!”
Can we see it? The only danger in fighting the battles that G_d puts before us is to believe that we have to fight them. Oh yes, there will be action, but for any of it to be successful it must be inspired by Him and empowered by His strength. And so, when the victory is won, there is no need for some sort of worried vigilance over the outcome.
This fool of a writer has just been through a protracted and grim battle to assist a dearly loved one to continue their walk into freedom. So, this entry (as most writing is) is autobiographical. And there is a part of my soul that is still kicking at the darkness that is receding around the other person’s life, instead of dancing in the light that is beginning to bleed through in torrents. So yeah, i am learning right along side you beloved.
He’s got it. At ease warrior.
