Insecurity not only paralyzes our relationship with the living God but has a devastating effect on interpersonal relationships. It is the starting point of all social estrangement. It breaks down openness, which is the bridge to the existential world of the other. It undermines real communication and causes a kind of rupture in the evolution of authentic personality.”
~Brennan Manning, The Importance of Being Foolish: How To Think Like Jesus
I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit He takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit He prunes, that it may bear more fruit. Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in Me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in Me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing. If anyone does not abide in Me he is thrown away like a branch and withers; and the branches are gathered, thrown into the fire, and burned. If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. By this My Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be My disciples. As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in My love. If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love. These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full… “This is My commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. You are My friends if you do what I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you. You did not choose Me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in My name, He may give it to you. These things I command you, so that you will love one another.
~ Jesus, King of The Universe and my very best Friend, in John 15
Oh beloved, it is true. There is within us an ache beyond words. We are constantly under attack by the Liar, and by the lies we tell ourselves. We feel alone and isolated by the circumstances and glances of others. We fail people and they fail us, and the divisive influences of all of this can drive us to feel as though we will never truly connect with another.
And there is another truth in all of this trouble. We cannot make connections with people in any lasting manner without the help of G_d Himself. We honestly have no idea how to make the connections. There is way too much of us in the way. The interference created by our own egos creates a repulsive field around us.
Further, we live in a nearly constant state of fear. We are afraid of what people think about us. We are even more afraid that they may reject the reality of who we are. And these impulses get us dancing around in some sort of frenetic dance, trying to constantly position ourselves in the best light.
He does break through a little of this at first. We feel the first warm breaths a real spring in our wintry souls. We know that there is some sort of a truly kind and loving Person behind our salvation. But in our ignorance, we do not realize that we have come up against a Love of a completely other kind.
We strive and try to get close to Him. We try to abide. And all we do is mess it up. We miss it altogether. We keep trying to get ready to go and meet Jesus, when He is already knocking at the door. All we have to do is open it.
He comes in, and OH!, there is nothing like it. We begin to understand. The whole thing, the rescue, the saving, the setting apart has almost nothing to do with what we thought it was before. At first, we could only remember the flames and foul stench from which we had just been delivered. We were sitting there like a survivor of a catastrophe…. just glad to be alive!
But very quickly, we begin to see that everything about this is richer and more complete than we can even begin to understand. The Love and understanding and wisdom and hope and strength and reality of it all is exceedingly, abundantly beyond anything we could hope or imagine. We drink in deep draughts of His wine, and find that instead of intoxication – there comes a clarity we never dreamed possible.
It gets better, at first we are amazed by the sensations the relationship with Him create. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this, but the glory is not the source of the wave being created. There is a Source. And suddenly, the doors of our thinking are torn off the hinges.
We see Him. And we are undone. We are undone by both our astounding poverty of spirit, and the infinite enormity of the riches of His. There is moment, for those willing for it to happen where we come to realize that all the riches of heaven would be poverty if He were not at the center of it all. And the fires of the depths of hell are where we would want to be, if that is where He is going to be.
Then it gets better.
He speaks to us. “Hello dearest friend. I AM here. I AM abiding in you. You are never alone. Not ever again. We, you and I, are united.”
“Oh Jesus, i was trying so hard to find this place, and never could. Thank you! But…”
“Yes beloved?”
“I want more.”
“What would you have?”
And we answer in the most strange manner we could ever have imagined before we came to know Him… “i want whatever You want.”
And then, He answers in a way we beyond the realm of imagination, “I know this, and you honor Me with your desires. Now beloved, make your demand, I AM yours for the asking.” Yes, the very King of The Universe is giving us an order. We are to ask for anything, and we are to believe (to the point of it being a demand upon His goodness) that He will give it.
So, we try it… And what comes from us – again – is something completely other than what we would have said before: “Father, i desire that a vast legion of others join us in the joy of our relationship. i demand that any who come to know You through me, be blessed with a double portion of the joy you have poured into my life in You.”
The answer is like the sound of many waters, “This will most surely happen. Oh what a joyful Life this will be dear one. I AM so glad to know you. You are My very favorite child!”
Can we see it? Something in us knows something that we truly had not known before… This is just the beginning. Eternity will be an utter necessity and nearly a paucity of existence to even begin to find the depths of the answers to all our questions and desires and hopes and dreams. And we want it all, because now to find what we are looking for is not to find fulfillment of merely our desires – but to find Him, and to know that our desires are the same.
So, are you feeling afraid in your relationships? Perhaps it is time for you to get the main relationship settled first. In Him, all the fear is gone, and there is room beyond measure for everyone else as well. It’s all there beloved. All of it and more. Just abide.
